If you've read through my blog or know me at all, you already know that I am not one to accept anyone placing blame where it doesn't belong and particularly not when it belongs on themselves. Try, if you will, to imagine my disgust today when I read an article in the Daily Oklahoman titled "Many Adults Suffer ADD Problems". Excuse me?
The article claims that 17 million American adults suffer from ADD. How do they know? How do you pin that number down? Judging by their criteria which includes:
Inattentiveness
Easily Distracted
Disorganized
Aggressive
....
I'm sorry, what was I saying?
That list of criteria goes on and on, but if you take even those four I listed then I'd say they seriously lowballed their number! How many people do you know (including yourself) who regularly exhibit at least a couple of those? Yeah, pretty much everyone.
The basis for this article is a book titled "Healing ADD: The Breakthrough Program That Allows You To See and Heal the 6 Types of ADD" by Daniel Amen, M.D. The problem, of course, is that since your already inattentive if you are ADD you will never get to the end of the title much less have the attention span required to read it!!!
I just don't buy it. I say that so many people exhibit these traits because it's the kind of society we have built for ourselves. We're constantly pulled in several directions at once. We are bombarded with information at such a rate I don't think it's possible to keep up with it all. The machine is raging out of control and noone knows who's driving. It's yet another label to put on it to give people an out. Can you see the possibilities here? "I am a severely ADD adult so I can't help it if I don't remember to pay my bills." "I can't help it that I shot the guy in the other car. I'm ADD and he was pissing me off!" Need I go on???
There are exceptions to every rule. I am not naive enough to think that there aren't people out there who truly do suffer to the point that they cannot participate in society without help. I would also be shocked if that number were 17 million. What I fear is that articles like this will only fuel the phenomenon in today's society where we seek to find any other place to put the blame for our behavior and actions than where it should be resting...on ourselves. People who really need help are most likely either going to see a doctor on their own or have a friend or loved one take them. The doctor should be the one to direct a course of treatment, not a book recommended by a newspaper reporter.
I'm inattentive at times. I've certainly been known to blow my top at people on the roads. There are times, and not always rare ones, that I exhibit pretty much every behavioral trait mentioned in that column. Let me assure you that I am NOT ADD anymore than I'm from China. I accept the responsibility for my actions and face the consequences, both good and bad, that come from my choices. My hope is that, someday, society will have a change of heart and stop accepting the placing of blame for personal behavior on things like ADD.
5.07.2006
Time For Blast Off!
A month or so ago, I received an e-mail at work informing me that I could order tickets early to a show called "Blast". Having seen Blast before on TV, I decided to see about getting some tickets. Though they are fairly expensive, I ponied up for four so we could go and take the kids too.
For those of you who may not know what Blast is, it's a live performance show that utilizes elements from marching band, flag corps, drum corps, and dance. The end result is an incredible blend of sight and sound that takes you away from your cares for a couple of hours. Sometimes mellow, mostly upbeat, often funny, the show is unique and extremely entertaining.
I bought the tickets about a month in advance and told the kids about it. The response I got was pretty tame. They seemed happy about it but with no real idea about the show, they weren't what I would call excited. Over the next 30 days or so, not much was ever again said about it.
Then, Friday came and it was time to get dressed and go to dinner before heading downtown to the Civic Center for the show. The kids were starting to get excited, but mainly because it wouldn't be another "boring" Friday at home with Mom and Dad! Suzanne had to check her watch every five minutes during dinner in response to the kid's questioning when it was time to go to the theater. As we walked out of the restaurant and to the car, Rachel exclaimed "We are going to be late Daddy!"
The excitement that reached a peak as we were ushered into the theater to our seats quickly declined as the minutes waned leading up to show time. You see, we had gotten there about 20 minutes early! We were bordering on having a total meltdown with Rachel as the MC walked onto the stage. Showtime had arrived!
Blast opened with a rousing version of Bolero that gave us goosebumps and went on through a couple of additional numbers before coming to the number of the night...Battery Battle. Wow! The number starts with one drummer making us all laugh and showing off his skills, and what skills they were! It was a several minutes drumroll that consisted of him using both ends of his drumsticks, each of his fingers in turn, his elbow, his shoulder, and his ear! He even used the stand during one point.
As good as that was, then a second drummer came out and they proceeded to move all over stage faking a real fight and trading drumrolls the whole time. The kids were 100% into the program and we were all having a great time!
After intermission came the highlight of the night, though. I'm not sure what the the name of the number was, but it started with only one instrument and slowly built until the stage was so full of cast members that they spilled into the audience! To the time of a very upbeat tune, the cast went all around the crowd playing their instruments, high fiving, and shaking hands with the crowd. Rachel even got into the act dancing around and slapping fives with the cast members that came by!!!
After they finished the finale and bowed to the crowd, the entire drumline headed up the aisles, out of the theater, and into the concourse where they proceeded to usher the crowd out with a steady beating of their drums. They ended up playing another 5 minutes or so to the gathered crowd and then stayed to sign autographs and in general soak up the atmosphere.
As we exited the theater to pouring down, cold rain, nothing was going to soak our spirits. We had truly had a Blast!
For those of you who may not know what Blast is, it's a live performance show that utilizes elements from marching band, flag corps, drum corps, and dance. The end result is an incredible blend of sight and sound that takes you away from your cares for a couple of hours. Sometimes mellow, mostly upbeat, often funny, the show is unique and extremely entertaining.
I bought the tickets about a month in advance and told the kids about it. The response I got was pretty tame. They seemed happy about it but with no real idea about the show, they weren't what I would call excited. Over the next 30 days or so, not much was ever again said about it.
Then, Friday came and it was time to get dressed and go to dinner before heading downtown to the Civic Center for the show. The kids were starting to get excited, but mainly because it wouldn't be another "boring" Friday at home with Mom and Dad! Suzanne had to check her watch every five minutes during dinner in response to the kid's questioning when it was time to go to the theater. As we walked out of the restaurant and to the car, Rachel exclaimed "We are going to be late Daddy!"
The excitement that reached a peak as we were ushered into the theater to our seats quickly declined as the minutes waned leading up to show time. You see, we had gotten there about 20 minutes early! We were bordering on having a total meltdown with Rachel as the MC walked onto the stage. Showtime had arrived!
Blast opened with a rousing version of Bolero that gave us goosebumps and went on through a couple of additional numbers before coming to the number of the night...Battery Battle. Wow! The number starts with one drummer making us all laugh and showing off his skills, and what skills they were! It was a several minutes drumroll that consisted of him using both ends of his drumsticks, each of his fingers in turn, his elbow, his shoulder, and his ear! He even used the stand during one point.
As good as that was, then a second drummer came out and they proceeded to move all over stage faking a real fight and trading drumrolls the whole time. The kids were 100% into the program and we were all having a great time!
After intermission came the highlight of the night, though. I'm not sure what the the name of the number was, but it started with only one instrument and slowly built until the stage was so full of cast members that they spilled into the audience! To the time of a very upbeat tune, the cast went all around the crowd playing their instruments, high fiving, and shaking hands with the crowd. Rachel even got into the act dancing around and slapping fives with the cast members that came by!!!
After they finished the finale and bowed to the crowd, the entire drumline headed up the aisles, out of the theater, and into the concourse where they proceeded to usher the crowd out with a steady beating of their drums. They ended up playing another 5 minutes or so to the gathered crowd and then stayed to sign autographs and in general soak up the atmosphere.
As we exited the theater to pouring down, cold rain, nothing was going to soak our spirits. We had truly had a Blast!
5.03.2006
No Inspiration
Wanted to post and make sure you all knew I hadn't forgotten to make a new column or anything. I just really haven't found the inspiration for a good post this week. I've started a couple and it was really more about me reaching for something humorous to post instead of really having something to say.
Rest assured, inspiration will surely hit soon and I'll have something relevant to post here. Sit tight!
Rest assured, inspiration will surely hit soon and I'll have something relevant to post here. Sit tight!
4.24.2006
I See Weird People
I feel a little bit like that kid from the movie "The Sixth Sense", except I'm seeing weird people instead of dead people.
Now, this is nothing new I know and I'm quite sure I'm not the only one seeing them...and I can only hope (futile I'm sure) that someone isn't looking at me and saying the same thing! It's just that the people who are celebrities for whatever reason and the people that get interviewed on the evening news or on news magazine shows just seem to get weirder and weirder. No concept of "normal", no perception of what reality is to most of us.
Driving in to work this morning, I hear on the radio that Tom Cruise is planning on eating the placenta from the recent birth of his baby. What?!?!?!?! A caller to the show went on to point out that this is common practice in many cultures around the world and is, in fact, a delicacy! You have GOT to be kidding me. I simply have no basis for wrapping my brain around this. What good is supposed to come of that? Why on earth would you want to eat that thing? It isn't food...it's a reproductive organ! Don't even get me started on Scientology...there is so much room for the discussion of weirdness there that I might overrun my word allotment for one post. Let me just try and sum it up by saying that it wouldn't surprise me if I heard one day that Scientologists were planning a moonlight party comprising of a healthy dose of arsenic laced Kool-Aid while waiting for the galactic warlords to come and and take them away while raining down their destruction on all of us non-believers.
What is it about becoming famous that you completely lose touch with reality? Is there nothing anymore that shocks us or repulses us? Have we come to an age where everything is acceptable if that's what it takes to avoid pissing anyone else in the world off? You have people doing things today that would have gotten them the gas chamber 30 years ago...and they get away with it! You have criminals who can now get away with claiming temporary insanity? Isn't murder, rape, or a variety of other abominable acts by definition insane???
Are people like me, who find the way people act anymore completely off the weird scale, the minorty now...making us the weird ones? Here are just a few more examples of things I find weird...see if you agree!
Why is it that after a tornado, hurricane, or some other natural phenomenon blows through town, the only people that the news reporters can find to interview are the ones with dirty shirts and no teeth?
Why is it that star athletes can get away with doing things that would put the rest of us in a cell next to a big man named Bubba for a very long time...but they get nothing more than a slap on the wrist and a start in their team's next game?
Why is that 99% of all "reality" shows on television have so little to do with reality as to render the entire genre ironic?
I suppose weirdnes is just a part of life and that what is weird to some will always be perfectly acceptable to others. Maybe it's just me...maybe it isn't getting worse. What do you think?
Now, this is nothing new I know and I'm quite sure I'm not the only one seeing them...and I can only hope (futile I'm sure) that someone isn't looking at me and saying the same thing! It's just that the people who are celebrities for whatever reason and the people that get interviewed on the evening news or on news magazine shows just seem to get weirder and weirder. No concept of "normal", no perception of what reality is to most of us.
Driving in to work this morning, I hear on the radio that Tom Cruise is planning on eating the placenta from the recent birth of his baby. What?!?!?!?! A caller to the show went on to point out that this is common practice in many cultures around the world and is, in fact, a delicacy! You have GOT to be kidding me. I simply have no basis for wrapping my brain around this. What good is supposed to come of that? Why on earth would you want to eat that thing? It isn't food...it's a reproductive organ! Don't even get me started on Scientology...there is so much room for the discussion of weirdness there that I might overrun my word allotment for one post. Let me just try and sum it up by saying that it wouldn't surprise me if I heard one day that Scientologists were planning a moonlight party comprising of a healthy dose of arsenic laced Kool-Aid while waiting for the galactic warlords to come and and take them away while raining down their destruction on all of us non-believers.
What is it about becoming famous that you completely lose touch with reality? Is there nothing anymore that shocks us or repulses us? Have we come to an age where everything is acceptable if that's what it takes to avoid pissing anyone else in the world off? You have people doing things today that would have gotten them the gas chamber 30 years ago...and they get away with it! You have criminals who can now get away with claiming temporary insanity? Isn't murder, rape, or a variety of other abominable acts by definition insane???
Are people like me, who find the way people act anymore completely off the weird scale, the minorty now...making us the weird ones? Here are just a few more examples of things I find weird...see if you agree!
Why is it that after a tornado, hurricane, or some other natural phenomenon blows through town, the only people that the news reporters can find to interview are the ones with dirty shirts and no teeth?
Why is it that star athletes can get away with doing things that would put the rest of us in a cell next to a big man named Bubba for a very long time...but they get nothing more than a slap on the wrist and a start in their team's next game?
Why is that 99% of all "reality" shows on television have so little to do with reality as to render the entire genre ironic?
I suppose weirdnes is just a part of life and that what is weird to some will always be perfectly acceptable to others. Maybe it's just me...maybe it isn't getting worse. What do you think?
4.17.2006
To Be Free Or Not To Be Free...
That is today's question.
We have nearly limitless freedoms in this country. Sometimes I think we may have too much freedom in some areas, but that's a more serious discussion than I intend to have today. What I'm specifically concerned with today are the personal freedom's athletes and celebrities are allowed to have and whether or not that's a good thing...and me being a sports nut, specifically personal freedoms in team sports.
Being a celebrity or athlete grants you something few of us normal people ever get to experience. They are afforded ample opportunities to air their thoughts and feelings in settings where many, many people will hear them. My question to you is...is this really a good thing? Now the immediate argument in favor would state that we normal people have just as much freedom to tune them out as we do to actually listen to what they have to say. Something akin to a jury being told to disregard something they've seen or heard in a courtroom. They are told they have a duty to disregard it, but do you think that ever really happens? I don't think it does and I don't see how I could not take that information into account when trying to form a verdict. So when a famous person stands in front of a camera with a microphone and starts pushing a personal agenda, doesn't it stand to reason that it will have at least a degree of impact on a good number of us?
Will there be people who just tune it out or disregard it? Sure. Will there be even more who consider it gospel simply because of the source? Most definitely. Finally, as information flows more and more freely, doesn't it stand to reason that more of us are thinking much less often for ourselves and instead allow famous people whom we don't even know to dictate our beliefs to us?
Alright, so now that I've gotten the serious stuff out of the way and maybe given you food for thought there...let's move on to the athletes and their culture.
Most athletes don't live in the real world. They make more money in a year than some of us will in our lifetimes. Their existence is on a completely different plane from most of us. They have huge homes, fancy cars, and a set of problems completely different from the rest of us. So, when athletes do something outside of normal gameplay to distinguish themselves, is that a good thing or a bad thing?
When Terrell Owens once upon a time scored a touchdown in Dallas and proceeded to run to midfield and start celebrating on the big star, was that harmless fun, juvenile showboating, just plain wrong, or all of the above? When the first basketball player started the throat slashing gesture or extremely loud yell after a dunk, was that spur of the moment jubilation that was poorly executed or maliciously exclaming thier superiority? When a baseball player hits what he knows is a homerun and stands at homeplate eyeballing the pitcher and soaking it all in, is that reveling in the moment or making themselves look good at someone else's expense?
When does it all get to be too much? When does personal freedom go to far?
The NFL is cracking down again on celebrations because they've turned into planned happenings complete with props and non-team member participants. The NBA long ago outlawed the throat slash because it's just plain wrong (shame the players didn't understand that for themselves, isn't it?), and has even determined that players are not allowed to wear tights on court because it singles them out against the other players. Are these measures too harsh? Is it harmless fun or is it crossing moral and/or societal lines?
Personally, I don't think you should go out of your way to call attention to yourself when playing a team game. I don't think you should ever single yourself out over someone else in a way that is hurtful or malicious. I think it's great to celebrate when you do something worth celebrating (ie. hitting the winning shot or scoring the touchdown to put your team in the playoffs). I also think it's pretty cool when megastars like Barry Sanders or Marvin Harrison simply toss the ball to the official. I think it's neat when the fans are allowed to be a part of the celebration like the do with the Lambeau Leap in Green Bay. To me, you cross the line when you celebrate in the face of your opponent, call attention to their failure, or go out of your way to show the world how special you think you are.
I want to hear what you think...which side of the line do you fall on? Am I right on the money or am I just too old school and set in my ways when it comes to matters of personal freedom?
We have nearly limitless freedoms in this country. Sometimes I think we may have too much freedom in some areas, but that's a more serious discussion than I intend to have today. What I'm specifically concerned with today are the personal freedom's athletes and celebrities are allowed to have and whether or not that's a good thing...and me being a sports nut, specifically personal freedoms in team sports.
Being a celebrity or athlete grants you something few of us normal people ever get to experience. They are afforded ample opportunities to air their thoughts and feelings in settings where many, many people will hear them. My question to you is...is this really a good thing? Now the immediate argument in favor would state that we normal people have just as much freedom to tune them out as we do to actually listen to what they have to say. Something akin to a jury being told to disregard something they've seen or heard in a courtroom. They are told they have a duty to disregard it, but do you think that ever really happens? I don't think it does and I don't see how I could not take that information into account when trying to form a verdict. So when a famous person stands in front of a camera with a microphone and starts pushing a personal agenda, doesn't it stand to reason that it will have at least a degree of impact on a good number of us?
Will there be people who just tune it out or disregard it? Sure. Will there be even more who consider it gospel simply because of the source? Most definitely. Finally, as information flows more and more freely, doesn't it stand to reason that more of us are thinking much less often for ourselves and instead allow famous people whom we don't even know to dictate our beliefs to us?
Alright, so now that I've gotten the serious stuff out of the way and maybe given you food for thought there...let's move on to the athletes and their culture.
Most athletes don't live in the real world. They make more money in a year than some of us will in our lifetimes. Their existence is on a completely different plane from most of us. They have huge homes, fancy cars, and a set of problems completely different from the rest of us. So, when athletes do something outside of normal gameplay to distinguish themselves, is that a good thing or a bad thing?
When Terrell Owens once upon a time scored a touchdown in Dallas and proceeded to run to midfield and start celebrating on the big star, was that harmless fun, juvenile showboating, just plain wrong, or all of the above? When the first basketball player started the throat slashing gesture or extremely loud yell after a dunk, was that spur of the moment jubilation that was poorly executed or maliciously exclaming thier superiority? When a baseball player hits what he knows is a homerun and stands at homeplate eyeballing the pitcher and soaking it all in, is that reveling in the moment or making themselves look good at someone else's expense?
When does it all get to be too much? When does personal freedom go to far?
The NFL is cracking down again on celebrations because they've turned into planned happenings complete with props and non-team member participants. The NBA long ago outlawed the throat slash because it's just plain wrong (shame the players didn't understand that for themselves, isn't it?), and has even determined that players are not allowed to wear tights on court because it singles them out against the other players. Are these measures too harsh? Is it harmless fun or is it crossing moral and/or societal lines?
Personally, I don't think you should go out of your way to call attention to yourself when playing a team game. I don't think you should ever single yourself out over someone else in a way that is hurtful or malicious. I think it's great to celebrate when you do something worth celebrating (ie. hitting the winning shot or scoring the touchdown to put your team in the playoffs). I also think it's pretty cool when megastars like Barry Sanders or Marvin Harrison simply toss the ball to the official. I think it's neat when the fans are allowed to be a part of the celebration like the do with the Lambeau Leap in Green Bay. To me, you cross the line when you celebrate in the face of your opponent, call attention to their failure, or go out of your way to show the world how special you think you are.
I want to hear what you think...which side of the line do you fall on? Am I right on the money or am I just too old school and set in my ways when it comes to matters of personal freedom?
3.31.2006
So What If I Don't Want To Make Lemonade???
You've all heard the saying and most of you have probably even uttered it at some point in your life...
"When life gives you lemons, make lemonade!"
Hell, I'm guilty of using it in the past. Today however, it sounds like the biggest bunch of cheery-assed bullshit I've ever heard. I'm not a happy person. I know usually I have some sort of positive message to throw out there, but today you get to hear my bitch (though I'm sure there is a silver lining there somewhere).
You see, the past 24 hours of my life has sucked. To ensure that you know that I am keeping this in perspective, I do realize that there are more layers of suck than there are in an onion and my current suck level is nowhere near as bad as it could be. Truly, I still have so much in life to celebrate and be thankful for but I also believe that clearing the air is a worthwhile endeavor from time to time. If nothing else, it helps you get it all out and get back to a place where you can start appreciating the good things again. And now for my story...
It all started last night. I was hanging with my buds on Xbox Live and just chilling out in preparation for bedtime. As I'm sitting there having a nice conversation, a hear a very loud pop immediately followed by my TV and laptop both blinking off. Now, before I go further you need to know that they are on completely seperate plugs on opposite sides of the room and also that the Xbox and stereo receiver are on the same strip as the TV but never even flinched. So as this freak power surge or whatever it was left it's mark, my TV slowly started to come back on and eventually the tube returned to it's regular state. My laptop however looked to be quite fried. It wouldn't power up at all and I couldn't get the battery out of it either. Long story short, I finally got it to power back up only to smell that horrible smell signifying burning electronics and my mouse (plugged in USB) decided not to work. Today, the smell is gone and the laptop seems mostly OK albeit not pushed at all just yet, but I have no USB at all...it's fried. Not good considering I use USB for my mouse, my backups, and my movie capture card. I'm basically screwed there for the time being until I can figure out if and how it might be repaired.
So that was bad, but not end of the world and not nearly enough to have me this pissed, right? Right.
I was doing a decent job of moving on from that when my cell phone rang at 8:10 this morning. It was my wife and she never calls then so I knew it was something bad. Turns out our dog...our 10 year old dog who's been with us the entire time we've lived in our house and is almost as old as our daughter...had decided that he didn't WANT to come inside this morning when it was time for her to go to work and, in fact, decided that it was worth it to him to turn around and bit the shit out of her. Bit both of her hands which of course scared the crap out of her. NOW I was pissed. He's been a great dog and we all love him very much, but he's old and has gotten progressively grumpy with our little dogs over the past few months. Still, he never showed his teeth to anyone in the family but me, and that was only in times when he was in trouble and felt scared (he never liked being yelled at much). So I come rushing home to find him, well, the only word for it is crazed. Out of control. Not good.
After checking on Suzanne's hands and making sure they weren't broken and that she was fine, we got him inside and calmed down but there is no way in hell I'm letting him be around my kids or anyone else's like that. No way at all. No choice but to have him put down.
Ready for the clincher?
We get to do this on the same fucking day that my son is having a birthday sleepover party with his friends from school. We get to not only deal with losing a much loved pet...no, member of the family. Nah, that just isn't enough pain, right? No. We have to bring our children home from school and break the news that their dog has to be killed. Yeah, take that lemonade and shove it right up your ass!
So here I sit, writing this and trying to find the room in my head to let my faith regain control and start to remember the positives again...and it just isn't working. I want to beat the crap out of something. I want to go drink myself under a table somewhere. I want to cry. Sure, I could handle it on my own. I could probably even help manage Suzanne's grief together with her. But having to tell my children something like this and help them put it into perspective for them and then somehow get my son to flip a switch and have a good time, well that might just be asking too much. While he's acting like he's having a good time, he mentions the fact that his dog is dying tonight regularly and I know the smile is only a cover. Me? I'm left to sit and stew with it. Lemonade? Not tonight I'm afraid.
Maybe tomorrow...
"When life gives you lemons, make lemonade!"
Hell, I'm guilty of using it in the past. Today however, it sounds like the biggest bunch of cheery-assed bullshit I've ever heard. I'm not a happy person. I know usually I have some sort of positive message to throw out there, but today you get to hear my bitch (though I'm sure there is a silver lining there somewhere).
You see, the past 24 hours of my life has sucked. To ensure that you know that I am keeping this in perspective, I do realize that there are more layers of suck than there are in an onion and my current suck level is nowhere near as bad as it could be. Truly, I still have so much in life to celebrate and be thankful for but I also believe that clearing the air is a worthwhile endeavor from time to time. If nothing else, it helps you get it all out and get back to a place where you can start appreciating the good things again. And now for my story...
It all started last night. I was hanging with my buds on Xbox Live and just chilling out in preparation for bedtime. As I'm sitting there having a nice conversation, a hear a very loud pop immediately followed by my TV and laptop both blinking off. Now, before I go further you need to know that they are on completely seperate plugs on opposite sides of the room and also that the Xbox and stereo receiver are on the same strip as the TV but never even flinched. So as this freak power surge or whatever it was left it's mark, my TV slowly started to come back on and eventually the tube returned to it's regular state. My laptop however looked to be quite fried. It wouldn't power up at all and I couldn't get the battery out of it either. Long story short, I finally got it to power back up only to smell that horrible smell signifying burning electronics and my mouse (plugged in USB) decided not to work. Today, the smell is gone and the laptop seems mostly OK albeit not pushed at all just yet, but I have no USB at all...it's fried. Not good considering I use USB for my mouse, my backups, and my movie capture card. I'm basically screwed there for the time being until I can figure out if and how it might be repaired.
So that was bad, but not end of the world and not nearly enough to have me this pissed, right? Right.
I was doing a decent job of moving on from that when my cell phone rang at 8:10 this morning. It was my wife and she never calls then so I knew it was something bad. Turns out our dog...our 10 year old dog who's been with us the entire time we've lived in our house and is almost as old as our daughter...had decided that he didn't WANT to come inside this morning when it was time for her to go to work and, in fact, decided that it was worth it to him to turn around and bit the shit out of her. Bit both of her hands which of course scared the crap out of her. NOW I was pissed. He's been a great dog and we all love him very much, but he's old and has gotten progressively grumpy with our little dogs over the past few months. Still, he never showed his teeth to anyone in the family but me, and that was only in times when he was in trouble and felt scared (he never liked being yelled at much). So I come rushing home to find him, well, the only word for it is crazed. Out of control. Not good.
After checking on Suzanne's hands and making sure they weren't broken and that she was fine, we got him inside and calmed down but there is no way in hell I'm letting him be around my kids or anyone else's like that. No way at all. No choice but to have him put down.
Ready for the clincher?
We get to do this on the same fucking day that my son is having a birthday sleepover party with his friends from school. We get to not only deal with losing a much loved pet...no, member of the family. Nah, that just isn't enough pain, right? No. We have to bring our children home from school and break the news that their dog has to be killed. Yeah, take that lemonade and shove it right up your ass!
So here I sit, writing this and trying to find the room in my head to let my faith regain control and start to remember the positives again...and it just isn't working. I want to beat the crap out of something. I want to go drink myself under a table somewhere. I want to cry. Sure, I could handle it on my own. I could probably even help manage Suzanne's grief together with her. But having to tell my children something like this and help them put it into perspective for them and then somehow get my son to flip a switch and have a good time, well that might just be asking too much. While he's acting like he's having a good time, he mentions the fact that his dog is dying tonight regularly and I know the smile is only a cover. Me? I'm left to sit and stew with it. Lemonade? Not tonight I'm afraid.
Maybe tomorrow...
3.25.2006
Perception Is 9/10 Of The Law
Have you ever been to magic show or seen one on TV? When the magician makes the pretty girl disappear or cuts her in half or any of a number of other illusions it seems real, doesn't it? I mean, you have the knowledge that it's an illusion so you know that it didn't really happen like you saw it and that's what makes it so much fun...the art of trying to figure out how you were deceived, right?
How often have you been told something that ended up really not being the truth at all? I'm betting that 99% of the time, the person who gave you the bad information believed it as truth. And the person that told them believed it as truth. What happens is sometimes we don't listen very closely when we're told something or we don't remember it quite right. We then relay what we think is accurate information to the next person, and on and on it goes. That is how things get warped so far out of shape that noone knows what the original story really was anymore. Pastor Craig at Lifechurch has a saying that I really love. "A lie believed as truth will affect you as though it were true", he says. It's a profound and powerful, well, truth! I have taken that and come up with my own little saying...Perception is nine tenths of the law. In other words, what you perceive to be true will have the exact impact of a solid truth on your life whether it is true or not.
Of course, it never will realistically happen that we never get a story wrong...so this problem will never go away. How on earth to deal with it then?
Don't Believe Everything You Hear
Often with a little bit of thought and common sense, you can get to the real truth. Sometimes it means going back to the source of a conversation for clarification. Sometimes it means doing a little independant research of your own to make the determination. The point is, even when it comes from a trustworthy source, it is important to remember how easily things get twisted around and to always try and make sure it's right before you act on it or store it away as truth and pass it along.
Fall Back On Your Faith
If you happen to be a person without any faith, this is a real problem. I would humbly and firmly suggest that you give it an honest try. For the rest of us, use your faith!!! Most of you reading this are going to be Christians, but even if you aren't, your faith in a higher power by whatever name you give it will work. Use the truth that is found there to determine how likely the things you see and hear each day are actual truths. My faith in God allows me the freedom to examine everything and see if it falls in line with that faith. Constant examination of your world will leave far less room for the lies to sneak through.
Temper Your Words
This one probably has the most potential to do the most good. By being careful about what you let come out of your mouth (or hands), you can at least be sure that anything that comes to you in a twisted fashion doesn't move any further down the line. So before you give advice, tell a story, or otherwise pass things along to others, take a minute and make sure that your information is correct that your motives for what you are doing are pure.
Remember, the world will do it's damnedest to pull the wool over your eyes...and it will come from the people you know and trust more often than not, the people in your innermost circle. They don't even realize they are doing it. Don't believe everything you hear, fall back on your faith, and temper your words, and you will find that the perception you carry of your world will change in significant ways.
How often have you been told something that ended up really not being the truth at all? I'm betting that 99% of the time, the person who gave you the bad information believed it as truth. And the person that told them believed it as truth. What happens is sometimes we don't listen very closely when we're told something or we don't remember it quite right. We then relay what we think is accurate information to the next person, and on and on it goes. That is how things get warped so far out of shape that noone knows what the original story really was anymore. Pastor Craig at Lifechurch has a saying that I really love. "A lie believed as truth will affect you as though it were true", he says. It's a profound and powerful, well, truth! I have taken that and come up with my own little saying...Perception is nine tenths of the law. In other words, what you perceive to be true will have the exact impact of a solid truth on your life whether it is true or not.
Of course, it never will realistically happen that we never get a story wrong...so this problem will never go away. How on earth to deal with it then?
Don't Believe Everything You Hear
Often with a little bit of thought and common sense, you can get to the real truth. Sometimes it means going back to the source of a conversation for clarification. Sometimes it means doing a little independant research of your own to make the determination. The point is, even when it comes from a trustworthy source, it is important to remember how easily things get twisted around and to always try and make sure it's right before you act on it or store it away as truth and pass it along.
Fall Back On Your Faith
If you happen to be a person without any faith, this is a real problem. I would humbly and firmly suggest that you give it an honest try. For the rest of us, use your faith!!! Most of you reading this are going to be Christians, but even if you aren't, your faith in a higher power by whatever name you give it will work. Use the truth that is found there to determine how likely the things you see and hear each day are actual truths. My faith in God allows me the freedom to examine everything and see if it falls in line with that faith. Constant examination of your world will leave far less room for the lies to sneak through.
Temper Your Words
This one probably has the most potential to do the most good. By being careful about what you let come out of your mouth (or hands), you can at least be sure that anything that comes to you in a twisted fashion doesn't move any further down the line. So before you give advice, tell a story, or otherwise pass things along to others, take a minute and make sure that your information is correct that your motives for what you are doing are pure.
Remember, the world will do it's damnedest to pull the wool over your eyes...and it will come from the people you know and trust more often than not, the people in your innermost circle. They don't even realize they are doing it. Don't believe everything you hear, fall back on your faith, and temper your words, and you will find that the perception you carry of your world will change in significant ways.
3.18.2006
The Nature Of Learning
As promised in my last entry, I'm going to go more in depth about my son, his grades, and what I've come to believe about how we learn.
Zach is about to turn 12 and he is as sharp as a tack. He's such a cool kid to sit down and talk to! He has an opinion about pretty much everything and it's usually at least a somewhat informed one. He's good at math, loves science, and can play hammer out tunes by ear on the harmonica, piano, or guitar...and this despite never having a formal lesson on any of them. Sounds like an intelligent kid, right? So how on earth could a kid like Zach be failing sixth grade? When I say failing, I don't mean that he just isn't doing well. No, I mean failing. He currently owns four F's out of six classes, including math and science!
Again, how on earth could this kid be failing so miserably at school???
First A Little Background
Zach having grade trouble first started showing itself in 3rd grade. He had a particularly demanding teacher that year and regularly had work missing or not 100% completed. We sent him to school with a full set of supplies only to hear that, less than 30 days into the school year, he had lost all of his pencils. His desk was just crammed full of old kleenex, wadded up papers, and lots of other things. His teacher hinted that we should have him tested for ADD or ADHD. Now, anyone who's ever spent 30 minutes with my son will tell you that there has never been a clearer cut case of a child not being either of those things. We rejected that immediately and, instead, focused on his organizational skills.
Throughout third grade, fourth grade, and the beginning of fifth grade we had more of the same. We tried everything to get him more organized and to be responsible for himself. We begged his teachers to not let him just make missing work up with no penalty. For the whole time, we could always sit down and talk with him about what they were learning in class and without fail he could talk intelligently about it. His grades always came out alright despite these problems because his teachers have always cared about him and loved having him in their classes. Basically, they cut him breaks all of this time because he's such a good kid. It was like watching a train barreling down the tracks straight at us...we knew sooner or later it was going to run us over.
And Then Came Sixth Grade
When we went to middle school orientation for sixth grade parents, we were told up front that it was going to be a different experience. We were told that our children would struggle through the first part of the year as they would now be having to migrate from class to class every hour, would no longer be allowed to carry a backpack or any type of bag with them, and would basically be responsible for themselves. In other words, the hand-holding was about to stop.
What we didn't realize was that the school staff was going to go completely to the opposite extreme from what the elementary staff had done. It's almost like they don't really care at times. Friends of Zach's who have always been straight A students are now C students. Others who have always done decent but not great (like Zach) are now failing or close to it. It hasn't gotten better as promised in the orientation and the staff doesn't seem likely to ease up on them at all.
We recently called for a meeting with the principal and all of Zach's teachers. We wanted to talk more about why his grades are still just as poor and see what we can do about it. What we got from them was that Zach is a well behaved boy who mostly pays attention in class but sometimes has trouble remembering to put his name on his papers. Apparently, this is something the entire sixth grade has trouble with which results in their poor grades as the teachers just count a zero and toss the nameless papers aside. I'm the first one to say that these kids should know to put their name on their papers, but they've been reminded and babied along about it in elementary school so isn't this to be expected? Couldn't the sixth graders be weened off of that without just failing them?
The Nature Of Learning
I've come to change my thinking about how we learn. I know it isn't an earth shattering revelation or anything, but I never realized before how many different ways there are in which people learn things. I never understood how much impact a child's environment has on their ability to learn. Some kids are very independant and will learn just about anything simply by reading a book. Others do well if you sit down in a one on one environment and explain things to them where they are free to ask questions. Others do better in a group where they can just sit back and listen to other's questions. Yet others only truly learn by experience (ie. failure).
The bottom line I think is this...you are only going to learn something when you are interested in learning it. Thinking back to my school days, there was much that I memorized long enough to take a test on it only to forget it shortly thereafter. Then there were the things that really interested me that I truly learned and carry with me to this day.
The challenge in public schools to effectively teach rooms full of kids that are all going to learn things differently. Is this really a recipe for success? Could this be a contributing factor to why more and more kids are being home schooled or sent to private schools?
We are seriously considering home schooling Zach. Some initial research into it on the internet has returned a wealth of information. There are literally hundreds of support groups, sites with curriculums and information, and forums dealing with all things home school.
Given that our kids are increasingly exposed to the worst that the world has to offer, that we have no control over what they are exposed to while they are at school, and that there are so many varieties of methods of learning, it seems reasonable to me that this is a legitimate and viable alternative to public school for kids who aren't learning well at school and whose parents can't afford a private school where kids can get more individualized teaching.
Zach is about to turn 12 and he is as sharp as a tack. He's such a cool kid to sit down and talk to! He has an opinion about pretty much everything and it's usually at least a somewhat informed one. He's good at math, loves science, and can play hammer out tunes by ear on the harmonica, piano, or guitar...and this despite never having a formal lesson on any of them. Sounds like an intelligent kid, right? So how on earth could a kid like Zach be failing sixth grade? When I say failing, I don't mean that he just isn't doing well. No, I mean failing. He currently owns four F's out of six classes, including math and science!
Again, how on earth could this kid be failing so miserably at school???
First A Little Background
Zach having grade trouble first started showing itself in 3rd grade. He had a particularly demanding teacher that year and regularly had work missing or not 100% completed. We sent him to school with a full set of supplies only to hear that, less than 30 days into the school year, he had lost all of his pencils. His desk was just crammed full of old kleenex, wadded up papers, and lots of other things. His teacher hinted that we should have him tested for ADD or ADHD. Now, anyone who's ever spent 30 minutes with my son will tell you that there has never been a clearer cut case of a child not being either of those things. We rejected that immediately and, instead, focused on his organizational skills.
Throughout third grade, fourth grade, and the beginning of fifth grade we had more of the same. We tried everything to get him more organized and to be responsible for himself. We begged his teachers to not let him just make missing work up with no penalty. For the whole time, we could always sit down and talk with him about what they were learning in class and without fail he could talk intelligently about it. His grades always came out alright despite these problems because his teachers have always cared about him and loved having him in their classes. Basically, they cut him breaks all of this time because he's such a good kid. It was like watching a train barreling down the tracks straight at us...we knew sooner or later it was going to run us over.
And Then Came Sixth Grade
When we went to middle school orientation for sixth grade parents, we were told up front that it was going to be a different experience. We were told that our children would struggle through the first part of the year as they would now be having to migrate from class to class every hour, would no longer be allowed to carry a backpack or any type of bag with them, and would basically be responsible for themselves. In other words, the hand-holding was about to stop.
What we didn't realize was that the school staff was going to go completely to the opposite extreme from what the elementary staff had done. It's almost like they don't really care at times. Friends of Zach's who have always been straight A students are now C students. Others who have always done decent but not great (like Zach) are now failing or close to it. It hasn't gotten better as promised in the orientation and the staff doesn't seem likely to ease up on them at all.
We recently called for a meeting with the principal and all of Zach's teachers. We wanted to talk more about why his grades are still just as poor and see what we can do about it. What we got from them was that Zach is a well behaved boy who mostly pays attention in class but sometimes has trouble remembering to put his name on his papers. Apparently, this is something the entire sixth grade has trouble with which results in their poor grades as the teachers just count a zero and toss the nameless papers aside. I'm the first one to say that these kids should know to put their name on their papers, but they've been reminded and babied along about it in elementary school so isn't this to be expected? Couldn't the sixth graders be weened off of that without just failing them?
The Nature Of Learning
I've come to change my thinking about how we learn. I know it isn't an earth shattering revelation or anything, but I never realized before how many different ways there are in which people learn things. I never understood how much impact a child's environment has on their ability to learn. Some kids are very independant and will learn just about anything simply by reading a book. Others do well if you sit down in a one on one environment and explain things to them where they are free to ask questions. Others do better in a group where they can just sit back and listen to other's questions. Yet others only truly learn by experience (ie. failure).
The bottom line I think is this...you are only going to learn something when you are interested in learning it. Thinking back to my school days, there was much that I memorized long enough to take a test on it only to forget it shortly thereafter. Then there were the things that really interested me that I truly learned and carry with me to this day.
The challenge in public schools to effectively teach rooms full of kids that are all going to learn things differently. Is this really a recipe for success? Could this be a contributing factor to why more and more kids are being home schooled or sent to private schools?
We are seriously considering home schooling Zach. Some initial research into it on the internet has returned a wealth of information. There are literally hundreds of support groups, sites with curriculums and information, and forums dealing with all things home school.
Given that our kids are increasingly exposed to the worst that the world has to offer, that we have no control over what they are exposed to while they are at school, and that there are so many varieties of methods of learning, it seems reasonable to me that this is a legitimate and viable alternative to public school for kids who aren't learning well at school and whose parents can't afford a private school where kids can get more individualized teaching.
3.07.2006
State of the GSZR
Yeah, I know...I KNOW. It's been about three full weeks since my last post. I apologize, really I do! I have good reasons if you will let me just explain, k?
Things have been sort of hectic and very much up in the air at the Wild house lately. I finally have my wife mostly recovered from her surgery and back at work so things are actually almost back to routine there. Beyond that, stability is a precious commodity. Check it out:
Things have been sort of hectic and very much up in the air at the Wild house lately. I finally have my wife mostly recovered from her surgery and back at work so things are actually almost back to routine there. Beyond that, stability is a precious commodity. Check it out:
- Work. I'm in the middle of a very large project that when finally completed will have spanned more than a calendar year. Where I am right now I am trying to finish up some tasks with a pretty hard deadline, having to work on testing all of my stuff for a new back-end system release, preparing for some required hardware and software upgrades that include a radical reconfiguration of our environment, and I'm getting hammered by our business units for some minor fixes here and there that must be scheduled around everything else. Nothing I can't handle, just makes me very busy and eats into what had become my normal blog posting time on my morning breaks.
- My son's grades. I will write much more about this soon (maybe tomorrow) but for now, just understand that his grades suck, we aren't real sure how much support we're getting from his teachers to get him help, and we are seriously considering home schooling him indefinitely after this year.
- Church. While I'm extremely excited about what God is doing in my and my family's lives right now, it's still a little stressful. I have taken on a role in which I get to help lead some small group bible study leaders. It's not too terribly time consuming and I enjoy it, but when you add that to the fact that our church is starting a new campus soon and that Suzanne and I feel called to go and help out in getting it started, well, it requires some definite time to give thought to it.
- Finances. We have been fighting hard to get ourselves debt free. It takes time, effort, and discipline...all things I've been known to lack! Well, I'm happy to report we've just managed to knock a serious friggin' hole in it...our bills are about to go from 12 to 3. We will be able to accelerate everything, including paying off our house about 3 years ahead of schedule.
So, you see...there are good reasons why I just haven't found the energy to post more regularly. It wouldn't be fair to you, my readers, for me to be spitting out a bunch of crap just for the sake of posting. I wouldn't feel good about not posting something entertaining or thought provoking, so I just haven't posted at all. All of the things I mentioned will be settling down to some degree now, so I anticipate being much more regular with my posts. I would expect to find something to talk about at least a couple of times per week. Thank you for being patient and for replying when you've read something worthwhile and be sure to keep checking back regularly!
2.13.2006
Truth Behind The Lies
Listening to our local sports talk radio station one morning last week, I heard some excerpts from the NBA's All-Star Selection Show that aired on TNT the night before. What I heard briefly had me irritated. It bloomed into full anger for a very short time, and then I decided that it was probably all in good fun and that I hadn't heard the full story. Turns out I was right, but not everyone here took it as good naturedly as I did. That brings me to today's topic...Isn't there often some truth behind the lies that people tell? Isn't there usually a reason for you to get aggravated at someone who is spouting off?
Now for a little background...
The excerpts that I heard to start this little chain reaction were from an interview conducted by the TNT crew (including Reggie Miller and Charles Barkley). The focus of their interview was the New Orleans/OKC Hornets rookie sensation, Chris Paul. He was left off the all-star roster and they wanted to talk to him about it. As is his usual course of action, Sir Charles took to ribbing Paul during the interview. He asked Paul if there were cows and chickens in his yard. He wanted to know if there was anything to do in Oklahoma. He called my beautiful state a vast wasteland and went on to say (after the interview was over) that he wasn't sure the state was safe for black people, unless you are an Oklahoma Sooner or Hornets player.
What I heard on the radio was several small pieces of that individually. When taken as a whole and in the context of the interview, it was obviously Barkley being Barkely...funny and out on a limb. Now that is a round-a-bout way for me to get to the point, but my point is this.
There is truth to some of what he said.
You come to Oklahoma, you will find MANY a yard with cows or chickens...or both, in it! Like any state in the union, I'm sure there are places black people don't wanna go...just as there are places I know that white people don't go. You get the idea.
But there are people here who can't see through the schtick. They can't laugh it off and admit there is some truth there.
So why is that? Why is it that we tend towards the defensive and towards anger when someone calls us out instead of just fessing up to it and moving on?
I could cite countless instances of this happening. It's around you every day. Is it our nature? Are we ashamed of anything anyone else chooses to poke fun about? I'm really stumped here.
Aren't stereotypes at least a little bit true more often than not? Isn't that why they are stereotypes? I mean, sure there are exceptions and the stereotype doesn't usually tell anywhere close to the whole truth. But, there had to be a little truth there somehwere for it to have gotten started in the first place, right?
A story I heard later that day on that same radio station really summed it up nicely and really made me grin. The caller stated he was African-American and that he had been forced to move here a few years back. He stated that he had heard and, in fact, believed many of the stereotypes he'd heard about Oklahoma. Specifically, he had the notion that we all ride horses and that there aren't many roads. So the guy flies in here from wherever he came from and our airport is out in the middle of nowhere. Nothing but fields around it. As he gets in the car to drive away, he keeps seeing people on horseback! He said, "Oh no! It's really true!!!!"
Turns out that guy was calling in to tell us that he considers himself an Oklahoman for life now and couldn't imagine living anywhere else. He wanted to offer Barkley a weekend tour of our fair city.
I don't know why we get so upset over things others say. If it's true, fess up and move on. If it isn't, say it isn't and move on. But it seems to me that getting upset and angry about it and NOt letting it go only serves to feed the belief that what was said just might be true.
Sir Charles...you need to come check us out sometime, chickens and all. You will find it to be as safe as anywhere else, whether you are black, white, or purple. You will see how good the people here are, and if you come to a Hornets game, you will see what a real basketball crazed crowd is all about.
Now for a little background...
The excerpts that I heard to start this little chain reaction were from an interview conducted by the TNT crew (including Reggie Miller and Charles Barkley). The focus of their interview was the New Orleans/OKC Hornets rookie sensation, Chris Paul. He was left off the all-star roster and they wanted to talk to him about it. As is his usual course of action, Sir Charles took to ribbing Paul during the interview. He asked Paul if there were cows and chickens in his yard. He wanted to know if there was anything to do in Oklahoma. He called my beautiful state a vast wasteland and went on to say (after the interview was over) that he wasn't sure the state was safe for black people, unless you are an Oklahoma Sooner or Hornets player.
What I heard on the radio was several small pieces of that individually. When taken as a whole and in the context of the interview, it was obviously Barkley being Barkely...funny and out on a limb. Now that is a round-a-bout way for me to get to the point, but my point is this.
There is truth to some of what he said.
You come to Oklahoma, you will find MANY a yard with cows or chickens...or both, in it! Like any state in the union, I'm sure there are places black people don't wanna go...just as there are places I know that white people don't go. You get the idea.
But there are people here who can't see through the schtick. They can't laugh it off and admit there is some truth there.
So why is that? Why is it that we tend towards the defensive and towards anger when someone calls us out instead of just fessing up to it and moving on?
I could cite countless instances of this happening. It's around you every day. Is it our nature? Are we ashamed of anything anyone else chooses to poke fun about? I'm really stumped here.
Aren't stereotypes at least a little bit true more often than not? Isn't that why they are stereotypes? I mean, sure there are exceptions and the stereotype doesn't usually tell anywhere close to the whole truth. But, there had to be a little truth there somehwere for it to have gotten started in the first place, right?
A story I heard later that day on that same radio station really summed it up nicely and really made me grin. The caller stated he was African-American and that he had been forced to move here a few years back. He stated that he had heard and, in fact, believed many of the stereotypes he'd heard about Oklahoma. Specifically, he had the notion that we all ride horses and that there aren't many roads. So the guy flies in here from wherever he came from and our airport is out in the middle of nowhere. Nothing but fields around it. As he gets in the car to drive away, he keeps seeing people on horseback! He said, "Oh no! It's really true!!!!"
Turns out that guy was calling in to tell us that he considers himself an Oklahoman for life now and couldn't imagine living anywhere else. He wanted to offer Barkley a weekend tour of our fair city.
I don't know why we get so upset over things others say. If it's true, fess up and move on. If it isn't, say it isn't and move on. But it seems to me that getting upset and angry about it and NOt letting it go only serves to feed the belief that what was said just might be true.
Sir Charles...you need to come check us out sometime, chickens and all. You will find it to be as safe as anywhere else, whether you are black, white, or purple. You will see how good the people here are, and if you come to a Hornets game, you will see what a real basketball crazed crowd is all about.
2.02.2006
Silence The Squeaky Wheel!
I want to know why it is that the squeaky wheel gets the grease. I mean, where is our grease? Do we just not need grease? Are our wheels running smoothly?
Watching the news over the past few days, it seems as though everyone has some kind of bitch and quite a few of them have absolutely no inhibitions when it comes to voicing them. It's like we're in the perpetual shouting match. This person is trying to say something but has to talk over another...then a third person decides that they need to be heard too so they start talking even louder. It rapidly gets to a point where the noise is more deafening than a crowded school lunchroom.
I want very much to figure out a way to silence the squeaky wheel. Have none of these people ever heard the phrase "When life gives you lemons...make lemonade"? We, and when I say we I'm really talking about society as a whole, are far more content to point a finger and scream at the top of our lungs that it's someone else's fault we're in whatever predicament we find ourselves in. For example:
The government, despite messing up right after Katrina, has given more than 85 BILLION dollars to relief efforts. This is in addition to other relief efforts as well as continued work on rebuilding affected areas. Yet, all I'm hearing on the news is how pissed these people are that the government hasn't already come and rebuilt their house. Where I come from, you make sure you have insurance when you buy a house. If you buy a house in a flood prone area or a hurricane zone, maybe you should pay extra to be insured or move elsewhere. But please stop whining that MY tax dollars should build you a new house!
Gas prices. Yeah, they are high almost beyond belief. Yeah, it hurts everytime I go to the gas station...and I don't even own a gas guzzling SUV. Despite this fact, people are still driving cars that can't even dream about 20 miles per gallon. We aren't driving ANY less than we were a year ago. If you don't like the gas prices....drive less, carpool, buy a more efficient car...but I don't wanna hear anymore about how you can't afford to drive to the dadgummed mall! Energy companies will continue to make record profits as long as we continue to follow old habits.
What I wish more people understood is that we all have far more control over our destinies than we have been led to believe. To get a result you've never gotten, you have to do something you've never done. That starts with taking personal responsibility and continues with giving thought to what we can all do to better our own situations. I don't see where that's possible for many people when they are too busy blaming their plight on someone else.
Watching the news over the past few days, it seems as though everyone has some kind of bitch and quite a few of them have absolutely no inhibitions when it comes to voicing them. It's like we're in the perpetual shouting match. This person is trying to say something but has to talk over another...then a third person decides that they need to be heard too so they start talking even louder. It rapidly gets to a point where the noise is more deafening than a crowded school lunchroom.
I want very much to figure out a way to silence the squeaky wheel. Have none of these people ever heard the phrase "When life gives you lemons...make lemonade"? We, and when I say we I'm really talking about society as a whole, are far more content to point a finger and scream at the top of our lungs that it's someone else's fault we're in whatever predicament we find ourselves in. For example:
The government, despite messing up right after Katrina, has given more than 85 BILLION dollars to relief efforts. This is in addition to other relief efforts as well as continued work on rebuilding affected areas. Yet, all I'm hearing on the news is how pissed these people are that the government hasn't already come and rebuilt their house. Where I come from, you make sure you have insurance when you buy a house. If you buy a house in a flood prone area or a hurricane zone, maybe you should pay extra to be insured or move elsewhere. But please stop whining that MY tax dollars should build you a new house!
Gas prices. Yeah, they are high almost beyond belief. Yeah, it hurts everytime I go to the gas station...and I don't even own a gas guzzling SUV. Despite this fact, people are still driving cars that can't even dream about 20 miles per gallon. We aren't driving ANY less than we were a year ago. If you don't like the gas prices....drive less, carpool, buy a more efficient car...but I don't wanna hear anymore about how you can't afford to drive to the dadgummed mall! Energy companies will continue to make record profits as long as we continue to follow old habits.
What I wish more people understood is that we all have far more control over our destinies than we have been led to believe. To get a result you've never gotten, you have to do something you've never done. That starts with taking personal responsibility and continues with giving thought to what we can all do to better our own situations. I don't see where that's possible for many people when they are too busy blaming their plight on someone else.
1.16.2006
Quicktakes...Issue 2
Military Intelligence???
On the news this morning, I hear that we've bombed the hell out of a couple of huts in Pakistan because the head terrorist was going to be there for a holiday meal. Turns out he most likely wasn't there. Why? Because our military had recon planes circling the place for a few days prior to the attack. Now I'm not the brightest person on the planet for sure, but how many brain cells does it take to figure out that if you fly over the place scouting it out that maybe, just maybe, someone is going to alert your target that he shouldn't come? I am proud of our troops for doing their job. I have family members who have fought over there. But somewhere up the chain of command someone needs to sneeze and come across a clue once in a while.
Offically Mistaken
Way back in November, I had to watch as my beloved Oklahoma Sooners got supremely jobbed in Lubbock Texas. It wasn't at the hands of Texas Tech but at a herd of zebras hell bent on handing the Red Raiders a victory and thus assuring their safe passage out of town. I have historically been fairly critical of officials. They have so much technology at their disposal now it seems to me that it should be rare thing for a call to end up wrong. Imagine my displeasure as I watched the college bowl season which say poorly called games too numerous to mention and then on into the NFL playoffs which have been so badly messed up that even the site commentators AND the studio hosts have felt the need to comment on it...something usually regarded as taboo. Are the officials all getting too old? Is there some kind of under the table code where we don't want to overturn the field officials too often, making them look bad? I don't know the answer, but in a day and age where we have an abundance of cameras available and the technology of instant replay I don't see why 99% of the calls can't be the correct ones.
How Much Is Too Much?
I don't know how much play this has gotten outside of Oklahoma...last week an Oklahoma State alumnus, Boone Pickens, gave a financial gift to the OSU Athletic Department that totaled $165 million dollars. It's the largest single gift to a university in history. This isn't the first gift he's given and he's said it won't be the last. I think the quote I read was "This is only the beginning". Pickens is in the oil business, and has had a very good couple of years. He can afford it. My question is...when is it too much? How much has he given to his alma mater's cultural facilities or to acedemic endeavors? Did those contributions even compare? I will grant you that OSU athletics needs help. They have a wonderful basketball arena but are otherwise well behind the other Big 12 teams in almost every sport. They need help. But it bothers me that this man is trying to do it all on his own. I would have preferred to see him give more money to causes that will further humanity. Help cure a disease, help kids who otherwise would be unable to get teh enjoyment of learning to play a musical instrument. Pickens isn't a bad guy at all and I admire him for wanting to help his school. I just hope he pays as much attention to those other areas of need as he does to sports.
Hallmark Holidays
We are still a month out, but the biggest Hallmark Holiday of them all will quickly be upon us. No matter the origin, Valentine's Day has been comercialized to death. Here, go get a bunch of cards to tell the people you love how you feel when you should have been doing that all year long. Hey, go buy some roses for your lady...sure you'll spend about 4 times the usual amount on them, but you are supposed to do so! Get a reservation to an overcrowded restaurant to eat mediocre food and pay half a week's wages for it. Suzanne and I agreed a long time ago that we wouldn't do these things. When I buy her roses, it's on a Tuesday in August or a Monday in May...out of the blue and when she least expects it. I tell her I love her every day. I don't need a card to do it for me. Don't get me wrong, we always make sure and hug and kiss a little bit longer on February 14th. We may order chinese delivery or go eat somewhere casual with our kids that night, but we just don't get caught up in it. I challenge you to do something for your loved ones now. Do things for them later. Make a point to call them more often and tell them how you feel about them. Valentine's Day is a good time to do any of those things...just make sure it isn't the only time.
On the news this morning, I hear that we've bombed the hell out of a couple of huts in Pakistan because the head terrorist was going to be there for a holiday meal. Turns out he most likely wasn't there. Why? Because our military had recon planes circling the place for a few days prior to the attack. Now I'm not the brightest person on the planet for sure, but how many brain cells does it take to figure out that if you fly over the place scouting it out that maybe, just maybe, someone is going to alert your target that he shouldn't come? I am proud of our troops for doing their job. I have family members who have fought over there. But somewhere up the chain of command someone needs to sneeze and come across a clue once in a while.
Offically Mistaken
Way back in November, I had to watch as my beloved Oklahoma Sooners got supremely jobbed in Lubbock Texas. It wasn't at the hands of Texas Tech but at a herd of zebras hell bent on handing the Red Raiders a victory and thus assuring their safe passage out of town. I have historically been fairly critical of officials. They have so much technology at their disposal now it seems to me that it should be rare thing for a call to end up wrong. Imagine my displeasure as I watched the college bowl season which say poorly called games too numerous to mention and then on into the NFL playoffs which have been so badly messed up that even the site commentators AND the studio hosts have felt the need to comment on it...something usually regarded as taboo. Are the officials all getting too old? Is there some kind of under the table code where we don't want to overturn the field officials too often, making them look bad? I don't know the answer, but in a day and age where we have an abundance of cameras available and the technology of instant replay I don't see why 99% of the calls can't be the correct ones.
How Much Is Too Much?
I don't know how much play this has gotten outside of Oklahoma...last week an Oklahoma State alumnus, Boone Pickens, gave a financial gift to the OSU Athletic Department that totaled $165 million dollars. It's the largest single gift to a university in history. This isn't the first gift he's given and he's said it won't be the last. I think the quote I read was "This is only the beginning". Pickens is in the oil business, and has had a very good couple of years. He can afford it. My question is...when is it too much? How much has he given to his alma mater's cultural facilities or to acedemic endeavors? Did those contributions even compare? I will grant you that OSU athletics needs help. They have a wonderful basketball arena but are otherwise well behind the other Big 12 teams in almost every sport. They need help. But it bothers me that this man is trying to do it all on his own. I would have preferred to see him give more money to causes that will further humanity. Help cure a disease, help kids who otherwise would be unable to get teh enjoyment of learning to play a musical instrument. Pickens isn't a bad guy at all and I admire him for wanting to help his school. I just hope he pays as much attention to those other areas of need as he does to sports.
Hallmark Holidays
We are still a month out, but the biggest Hallmark Holiday of them all will quickly be upon us. No matter the origin, Valentine's Day has been comercialized to death. Here, go get a bunch of cards to tell the people you love how you feel when you should have been doing that all year long. Hey, go buy some roses for your lady...sure you'll spend about 4 times the usual amount on them, but you are supposed to do so! Get a reservation to an overcrowded restaurant to eat mediocre food and pay half a week's wages for it. Suzanne and I agreed a long time ago that we wouldn't do these things. When I buy her roses, it's on a Tuesday in August or a Monday in May...out of the blue and when she least expects it. I tell her I love her every day. I don't need a card to do it for me. Don't get me wrong, we always make sure and hug and kiss a little bit longer on February 14th. We may order chinese delivery or go eat somewhere casual with our kids that night, but we just don't get caught up in it. I challenge you to do something for your loved ones now. Do things for them later. Make a point to call them more often and tell them how you feel about them. Valentine's Day is a good time to do any of those things...just make sure it isn't the only time.
1.15.2006
Chronicles Of A (Near)Teenage Diva...Part 1
For those of you who didn't know, I have two kids. My son is 11 and my daughter...The Diva...is 9 going on 22. They are a constant source of entertainment in my life and I find myself consistently having the broadest range of emotions imaginable concerning them. Now, a son is an entirely different creature than a daughter. His room smells, he makes the full array of nasty noises, and he's very logical and down-to-earth in his approach to things. But I didn't come here today to speak about him. What follows is the first in what will likely be a long series of posts chronicling one little girls evolution from childhood to being a teenage diva.
I think the thing I have the most trouble adapting to is her wanting to look and act like a grown-up already. I mean, when I was 9 I don't remember the girls seeming so mature. Hell, I don't remember thinking about girls until 12 or so! I think it's natural for every one of us Dad's out there to want our little girls to remain little girls indefinitely. It's tough knowing that the days of her sitting on my lap and giving me a big hug are numbered. The inevitibility of me not being the first man in her life chills me to the core.
Exhibit A. We got the kids a cell phone for Christmas...something they could take with them on sleepovers or when they have activities. It's turned into Rachel's social line. It would be easier for me to count the minutes in the day that she isn't talking on it than it would to count the time she is. Whether she's playing a game, watching TV, whatever...you can bet she has the headset plugged in and is talking to a friend on it. My little girl now spends more time on the phone than she does talking to her family. Ugh...
Exhibit B. She finally talked her mother into curling her hair. I sat and watched as they worked the curling stuff into her hair, rolled it into curlers, installed a shower cap over it, and sent her to bed. Yes, my daughter...my little girl...slept in curlers! As we were getting ready for church yesterday, they took the curlers out and brushed her hair out. Lord help me, she comes walking out of the bathroom easily looking 5 years older than she did the day before. Don't get me wrong, it looked really good! It's just that she's not supposed to look 14 yet. Ugh again...
Exhibit C. Dressing up. When she was 5, to dress up meant taking some of her Mother's old ballet outfits, putting them on, and dancing about the house. Now it means something entirely different. I was first made aware of this phenomenon the last time I went to buy her clothes. The things I was picking out just weren't cutting it. She has become very fashion conscious and completely passed her old man by. Jeans with designs on them, colorful belts, pretty shirts, soemthing other than tennis shoes, and...(*gasp*) TRAINING BRAS. What happened to my little tomboy??? Her hair has to be done, she has to be looking good to leave the house. I feel that heartburn coming back now...and I KNOW I have less hair than I did when I started writing this post.
My little girl is starting to turn into a young lady and it just doesn't sit well with me. I know it's going to happen no matter how much I want it not to, and I will love her unconditionally throughout. I know we've raised our kids right. They have the right values, they have great heads on their shoulders. But with each passing day, I yearn to have my little girl hang around just a little bit longer.
I think the thing I have the most trouble adapting to is her wanting to look and act like a grown-up already. I mean, when I was 9 I don't remember the girls seeming so mature. Hell, I don't remember thinking about girls until 12 or so! I think it's natural for every one of us Dad's out there to want our little girls to remain little girls indefinitely. It's tough knowing that the days of her sitting on my lap and giving me a big hug are numbered. The inevitibility of me not being the first man in her life chills me to the core.
Exhibit A. We got the kids a cell phone for Christmas...something they could take with them on sleepovers or when they have activities. It's turned into Rachel's social line. It would be easier for me to count the minutes in the day that she isn't talking on it than it would to count the time she is. Whether she's playing a game, watching TV, whatever...you can bet she has the headset plugged in and is talking to a friend on it. My little girl now spends more time on the phone than she does talking to her family. Ugh...
Exhibit B. She finally talked her mother into curling her hair. I sat and watched as they worked the curling stuff into her hair, rolled it into curlers, installed a shower cap over it, and sent her to bed. Yes, my daughter...my little girl...slept in curlers! As we were getting ready for church yesterday, they took the curlers out and brushed her hair out. Lord help me, she comes walking out of the bathroom easily looking 5 years older than she did the day before. Don't get me wrong, it looked really good! It's just that she's not supposed to look 14 yet. Ugh again...
Exhibit C. Dressing up. When she was 5, to dress up meant taking some of her Mother's old ballet outfits, putting them on, and dancing about the house. Now it means something entirely different. I was first made aware of this phenomenon the last time I went to buy her clothes. The things I was picking out just weren't cutting it. She has become very fashion conscious and completely passed her old man by. Jeans with designs on them, colorful belts, pretty shirts, soemthing other than tennis shoes, and...(*gasp*) TRAINING BRAS. What happened to my little tomboy??? Her hair has to be done, she has to be looking good to leave the house. I feel that heartburn coming back now...and I KNOW I have less hair than I did when I started writing this post.
My little girl is starting to turn into a young lady and it just doesn't sit well with me. I know it's going to happen no matter how much I want it not to, and I will love her unconditionally throughout. I know we've raised our kids right. They have the right values, they have great heads on their shoulders. But with each passing day, I yearn to have my little girl hang around just a little bit longer.
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